My newest discovery is that right before my ears, the English language is changing to a new language called Newglish. All those beautiful mouths on television have a big daddy sitting behind them saying, “Talk faster, so we can say more in less time.” If they want their paychecks now and another job later, the mouths acquiesce. Their brains tell their tongues who tell their lips, and a sound bite becomes a soundbite.
Other fast talkers that take prizes for Newglish include Sherlock who talks so fast even he doesn’t know what he has said. Watson, his partner, talks even faster but mumbles, so the guessing game is on for all of us who hear Slowglish. Oh well, you can guess the plot on this show without knowing what they are saying.
If you don’t believe in this fast-talking of English turned into Newglish, listen to your children and grandchildren. They don’t speak in cursive, either, with words gracefully strung into sentences. They speak in texting shorthand. We love them anyway, so we listen fast.